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Velociraptor

This velociraptor was photographed from a safe distance in Australia’s Daintree Rainforest.

Most people think that velociraptors went extinct 70 million years ago, but there’s a handful left in Far North Queensland if you know where to look.

You’ve got to be pretty careful around velociraptors though. This one could’ve used his blade-like claws to rip me open if he wanted to, but we decided it would be mutually beneficial for this not to occur. He was like, “just don’t touch my baby and you’ll be fine mate”. This sounded fairly reasonable, and is rule #1 for dealing with velociraptors – don’t touch their babies.

Rule #2 for dealing with velociraptors is also pretty straightforward – don’t feed them. If you feed them, then they’ll think that all the humans have food, and they’ll get really mad if they come across another human who doesn’t have any food.

So, if you ever happen to stumble across a velociraptor, don’t feed them, and don’t touch their babies, and you won’t have any problems.

Okay, I have a confession to make. This isn’t a photograph of a velociraptor. But everything else I’ve told you is true. If you’d like to learn about the real owner of these feet, click here.